From The Heart ficlet

[moonlite_tryst]

Title: From The Heart
Author: lusiology
Rating: G
Pairing: H/D
word count: 210
Summary: ...please understand my clumsy attempt at putting my feelings into words
Disclaimer: No ownership, no money.



Draco,

I don’t have your gift of eloquence, so please understand my clumsy attempt at putting my feelings into words.

I’ve battled with this demon that sits on my shoulders like an enormous shadow for the last 20 years, scoring minor victories here and there but never truly winning the war, and I am exhausted.

I want peace.

Some days the demon’s wings overshadow me so much that it seems like the light has gone out of my life, leaving me to drown in a despair so suffocating it's difficult to withhold and, at the same time, draw breath, or even want to.

And that sense of hopelessness frightens me.

And you, Draco, once branded a so-called child of the dark, are my source of light and always have been; guiding me through the shadows, bringing hope back into my life. But I know I’m becoming too tired to follow the light.

All my love,

Harry

“We’re ready for you now Mr Potter if you’d like to come this way,” said the Healer. Harry rose from the chair and turned to give Draco a tight smile.

Draco returned the smile, letter in hand. “Harry,” he choked, “let there be light.”



Cross posted to toilntrouble and harrydraco

Comments

[earth-magic.livejournal.com]

Oh *wibble*

Wibbles some more. That is so sad and I understand completely the point Harry is at.

But now I'm left wondering what is going to happen to Harry and what are the Healers going to do to him.

You've said so much in a few words.

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

I understand completely the point Harry is at.

It's how I felt in June when I finally asked for help to combat the 'Big D' as I call it.

That is so sad

Oh dear, it's actually supposed to be hopeful at the end because Harry's finally stepped on to the road to recovery. Maybe it needs a sequel.

Thanks for the lovely comment.

[spark-of-chaos.livejournal.com]

Wow. I... Not somuch the letter, as the last two lines, the idea how the situation looks like... I've always admired people who can put so much sense into so few words. *g*

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

Their situation is based on experience and it's the first time I've ever tried to write about it. I'm really pleased it worked. :)

[spark-of-chaos.livejournal.com]

I've noticed that fics based on personal experiences turn out really good, mainly because you don't have to spend ages agonising over the correctness of that and that emotion or the realism of this and this line. You write something that is certainly true, and the reader can feel that. My own experience with RL-events-transformed-into-fics supports that, too.

[saladbats.livejournal.com]

I think you were successful in a hopeful tone shining through there at the end. And this was exactlky what I needed to read today. It's been one hell of a week.

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

I'm really sorry it's been a shitty week for you & things aren't looking up on the job front yet. I shall keep crossable bits crossed for you.

I'm glad you recognised that the ending was meant to be hopeful: that Harry was seeking treatment before being overwhelmed by the despair that comes with depression completely.

Now go get your girl and have some 'quality time' together.
Oh, and thanks for commenting. :D

[saladbats.livejournal.com]

You are too good to me. Thanks for crossing your bits for me. 8)

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

Know that my continued love and good wishes are with you.

I've entered the 2nd wave of fic challenges for the_eros_affair due in by 5th November. Will you be available for the special beta love by 2nd half of October? I've now got an excuse for another trip to London - to visit some of Soho's finest emporiums, for research purposes only you understand. I'll be setting it in the 'After The Ballet' universe.

[saladbats.livejournal.com]

I will gladly be able to provide beta services in the latter part of October. Just not on October 29-31 though, as Halloween time around here is crazy busy.

And I look forward to more of your London pics. Makes me almost feel like I am right there.

[jamie2109.livejournal.com]

I can see where this is coming from and understand how Harry feels. There is so much emotion in his clumsy attempt to explain his feelings. I did get the hopeful ending. It showed me two things. Harry getting help, finally, and Draco right there beside him while he does. Very hopeful. Lovely work honey, and I'm so happy that you are getting help with your own struggles with "the big D" *hugs*

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

I'm so happy that you are getting help

Thanks love. It's only took me 30 years to ask for it without feeling ashamed that I couldn't sort it out on my own.

Part of it was from a letter I wrote to my hubby when I truely couldn't face drawing another breath. And yes, Draco will be there for Harry and Harry will get well.

[meredyth-13.livejournal.com]

Ah! This is lovely. Truly beautiful, and so heartfelt. I'm truly sorry I missed this while I was away, and so glad you pointed it out to me.

What a fragile, tentative moment, and such eloquent words to express it with. I don't see it as sad, because there's something profound there, that precludes sadness.

*sighs*

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

and such eloquent words to express it with

You've brought a tear to my eye (in a good way) with your fantastic comment which is all the more special to me because I've struggled to write anything the last 8 weeks. *Hugs you tightly - never mind the cold germs*

[dacro.livejournal.com]

GAH! *heart breaks*
Wow. painfuly beautiful with a spoonful of hope.

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

Wow. painfuly beautiful

Imagine a grin bigger than the Cheshire cat's and a blush redder then Harry's. And yes, there's definitely hope. :D

[dacro.livejournal.com]

*biggest hugs and lots of love*

[wook77.livejournal.com]

wow. this was wow.

The final sentence made me tear up. This was so emotionally moving that I'm stuck with words like "beautiful" and "poignant" but there's so much more I want to say.

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

I'm stuck with words like "beautiful" and "poignant" but there's so much more I want to say.

Those words mean a lot to me and they say plenty, thankyou. I wrote and deleted the last line 4 times because I thought it might be cheesy. I'm glad I kept it in now. :)

[wook77.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you did also. So much emotion in such a little piece.

(mind if I friend you?)

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

(mind if I friend you?)

Not at all. *G* I'm flattered to be asked and will friend back although don't expect masses of fic, I'm still new to this adveture called writing.

[gloriousgentry.livejournal.com]

*cries* What are they doing to Harry? Make them stop *sobs*

But Harry is sweet, yes? Heartbreakingly so.

Gloriousgentry

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

They are helping Harry come to terms with the demon/depression that has plagued him most of his adult life. He loves Draco but he's tired of fighting the blackness and that scares him. Draco desperately hopes Harry won't succumb.

[symetric.livejournal.com]

For a minute there I couldn't speak. The torrent of emotions in this were squeezing my heart. It beautifully written and expressed.
I especially love the ending. So hopeful.

[moonlite-tryst.livejournal.com]

Oh! Thank you. This little drabble rarely sees the light of day. I'm v. happy that it can still pack a punch and that you picked up what I was trying to convey.